Mistakes made by women in family relationships

By all means, striving for harmony and prosperity in family life, we often achieve exactly the opposite effect. Why does this happen?

We women are very zealous in the science of building relationships with our second half. But sometimes even too much, for the men who are drilled by us often do not stand daily quests for matching the ideal that was drawn in our imagination. What prevents us from achieving family happiness and harmony in a relationship? "Take an example ..."
For some reason, it seems to many of us that a positive example (for example, the husband of Julia's friend - a sporting handsome man and a jack of all trades) - is an excellent incentive for the comprehensive growth of our own man. Say, hint at the superiority of another alpha male, and the beloved is taking every effort to develop and try to look at least as good as the role model we mentioned.

View from the outside
"If Yulin's husband is so good, why do you need me?" - our hero takes offense and in 70 cases of 100 refuses to conform to the ideal, and in 30 already for the sake of principle begins to compare you with Julia herself. Few will suffer when they are neglected in the open. But any comparison in someone's favor is exactly what it looks like. So the effect of this method will be just the opposite.

"You should!"
Each woman has her own long list of qualities, which, in her opinion, a real gentleman and companion of life should possess. And most likely, she will voice these qualities to her chosen one. Only does not take into account one moment - that the word "should" can cross out the most good and virtuous intentions.

View from the outside
Imagine a man who says to you: "I believe that a woman should ..." Who should? Him? For what reason? You're not in school at the exam. How much will you yourself strive for a relationship in which commitment will be paramount, and not acts caused by desire and love? All their wishes can be expressed without a formidable and in fact useless ultimatum. It is better to build a family on voluntary responsibility, harmony, peace and love than with the sense of duty of one of the spouses. Sooner or later, in this situation, someone will definitely not survive.

Third wheel
They say that every woman has an actress, and sometimes a whole drama theater. Quarreling, we often like to call witnesses around: "Do not you just listen to what he just said!" The fined man either goes into a deaf defense, or begins to attack himself or escapes. All three options in no way contribute to the strengthening of family ties.

View from the outside
Everyone suffers: a woman who makes a show of what only two people should understand and do it only in private; a man who immediately writes it down in hysterics and begins to be ashamed. As well as random or non-random witnesses who were caught up in the conflict and forced to spoil their mood with scenes from someone else's life. Of course, we all want to talk out from time to time, consult, sometimes even complain and cry. But this is not an excuse to turn your personal life into a mass event. If, of course, you do not aspire to become participants in a scandalously popular reality show ...

"Either I, or they!"
Every day a huge number of ladies present their satellites with ultimatums in the style: "Who do you need more, friends or I?" The presence of pious hobbies, not included in the category of "family members", embarrasses many, and some women are simply frankly annoying.

View from the outside
If you are jealous of his friends or hobbies, remember what exactly you fell in love with your man. After all, a significant role in shaping the merits of a loved one was played by his entourage and hobbies. Think about whether you need a boring, disinterested companion? Remember that always and in everything you can reach a compromise. Let your second half will be allocated a certain time on his hobby. In this case, both of you will win: the husband will be happy, doing his favorite occupation, and you can devote this time to yourself and your little female joys.

"I was blinded"
The ideal man can only be brought up! "- the ladies whisper among themselves and roll up their sleeves, rush to educate, cultivate, grow and" beat out nonsense. "Often in a correction man everything is subject: appearance, manner of behavior, habits.

View from the outside
To bring good and enlightenment is the noblest impulse. It's great when partners develop and stimulate each other, but only all changes and transformations must be voluntary. It's one thing when a man himself asks to go with him to the store and choose jeans or a suit, since he trusts your taste. And quite another - to hide or secretly carry in the garbage his favorite pants just because they personally do not like you. And if the next time he does the same with your handbag from Louis Vuitton?

Came the weekdays
Over time, the woman notices that the flowers in her living room appear only on holidays, trips to the restaurant are increasingly preferred to home dinners. "Bring back the romance!" - our heroine is going through.

A look from the side For most of the men, going to a restaurant is an opportunity to have a snack in an uncomfortably pompous place, requiring exorbitant fees for a rather dubious pleasure. It's always worth talking about one's wishes aloud, as well as that your chosen one is better than any superhero.

List of most popular claims
Check yourself, do these observations enter your personal list of requirements for a loved one?

1 st place
She came up with herself, she was offended - the talent of women to speak for a man and to draw conclusions for him.

2 nd place
Suspicion. Apparently, we are talking about a girl's psychotrauma called "Men need only one." Not true. Men need a lot. And this "one", by the way, is also a serious physical load.

3rd place
Inability to keep silent together. Sometimes it's nice to relax and not think about anything, staring at the wall, not responding to lightning questions in style: "What are you thinking about?", "Why are you silent?", "Are you bored with me?" Try it!