Why and why people who should be closest to each other so often quarrel? Where does misunderstanding begin? After all, for certain, if you follow certain tips, conflict situations in families would be less. According to statistics, about 70 percent of modern marriages in Russia today are disintegrating precisely because of various "irreconcilable differences". But it is often enough to avoid them, to know the recipes of family happiness.
Too often - too much.
Very often spouses spend too much time together. But as we know, any search of even useful ingredients, is able to ruin even the most good dish. Also things are going on with marriage. After we are used to spending all our free time with our loved ones, it will be difficult for us to let it go. On the other hand, we completely limit the circle of our communication. Thus, in the end, the only person who will be next to us is a spouse. Of course, with him would be paradise in the same hut. Yes, only the irritations and emotions that you previously told your friends or splashed out in the gym, when none of your acquaintances saw it, start to accumulate as a snowball. After a while, the same thing happens for men. In the end, you are falling in avalanche on each other, not having the opportunity to change over to something else, personal.
What to do?
Recipes of happiness are as follows. Even in the presence of a loved one, one should never forget that one must give time to oneself. And time should be provided to the beloved. After all, men also need a splash of negative emotions and experiences. It can be anything - from fishing for a man, until Sunday shows with friends for you. In any case, everyone in the family should have their own part of life, which will belong only to him. Nobody makes you want to be secretive. After all, for conversation will only be more if you and your second half spend some time separately. At the same time, for some things your personal inaccessible to a favorite occupation will help to look differently.
Learn to find a compromise.
Of course, compromises are one of the most difficult points of the relationship. Today so often you can hear: "Yes, he is just wrong!" Wrong - and the point. In fact, almost all psychologists agree that if a conflict situation arises, it is simply a clash of two opinions, it is simply unrealistic to call one of them right or wrong. But even with any quarrel, you must remember - that, most likely, the person you love suffers no less than you. We are so fond of continuing to pick up counterarguments even after the end of the conversation. Family happiness can not be built that way. Also come and men. That is why, due to the internal continuation of the quarrel, we can continue to sulk at each other for days on end. But what's the point, if you can come to a compromise. And this saves you time, and most importantly - your nerve cells will remain intact.
What to do?
In all situations, avoid formulations of the type - yes, you're generally wrong. In general, any statement that can be understood as an accusatory one should be excluded from this kind of negotiations. After all, sometimes you do not mean it at all. But subconsciously a person starts to think that this is an accusation, and literally immediately sets himself up negatively.
Secondly, always look for an opportunity where your interests and interests of your loved one would be combined. After all, no one really wants to be selfish and offend the other half. But these options are worth discussing. If you are not satisfied with going to the autoshop for spare parts for his seagull - tell me directly that he will be more interesting and comfortable without you.
Keep track of your intonations, do not break into screams and do not raise your voices, because it will be easier to achieve family happiness and mutual understanding. Firstly, this will not make your partner nervous, and secondly, it will be easier for you to control the course of the conversation and not bring it into hysteria from scratch, will not allow the dinosaur to fly from the fly.
General - brings together.
If in the very first case we talked about the fact that you should find an opportunity for individual interests, now it's worth talking about the interests of the common. And this should not only concern the everyday side of your life. Of course, nothing unites like buying a new TV or repairing an apartment, but apart from the monotonous side of family life there should be general hobbies and hobbies that will brighten up your family. It can be paired dances - classes of this kind are provided by modern fitness centers and personal teachers. Perhaps you will find yourself in the path of home games. Invite friends and for a cup of tea or a glass of wine by a big and friendly company play in "Crocodile" or "Mafia". Adrenaline, developed in the course of such exercises, will spur your feelings, help you look at your chosen one on the other side. And maybe your friends on each other. In any case - do not let everyday trifles completely capture your family life.
In conclusion, it must be said that, most likely, there is no single recipe for family happiness. You can only use several methods that will help you not quarrel over trifles and find common interests. The only thing that, of course, is important for every family, without which it is simply impossible to manage - this is the love that they give to each other. A family is not a cake or a pie, which can be cooked from a cookbook. It all depends on the products, the cooking conditions and many other factors. The only thing that is similar to family happiness and a piece of culinary art is that, with the right approach and a great desire, everything goes as it is shown in the picture or shown on television.