Before you go to such an open, direct conversation, carefully weigh what mistakes could be made while communicating with her husband. Treason can testify that your family is going through one of the most difficult periods of its development.
Think about what you will do when you hear reproaches from your husband about yourself, claims that may have accumulated in him for years. One of the causes of betrayal is life in an emotionally impoverished environment. Perhaps your husband does not have enough understanding. Are you ready to face this truth?
It's hardly worth talking to your husband about another woman, even if you have the certainty that she exists. Talk about yourself, about him, about your family, about future plans for a joint life.
Be prepared for the fact that if the husband confesses to treason, the desired relief may not come. In this case your reactions can be numerous. Many women come to a "suicidal" decision to deny their husbands intimacy, continuing to live with him in the same apartment. They can not step over their pride and turn life into hell, not only for themselves, but for all who are in touch with them.
You can blame your husband all your life, but think, can you become happier or even less unhappy with this? It will be a revenge to yourself, and such "pride" does not exalt you, but rather humiliates. "To hate is the most difficult and most disgusting chain that one person can relate to himself, because the rings of this chain are impregnated with anger and fear," wrote the Italian thinker Nicolo Hugo Foscolo.
If you feel that you have focused so much on resentment from the betrayal of your husband that it's hard for you to think about something else, you should probably turn to psychologists and psychotherapists.
But in any case, you have a choice that a woman can make herself. Try to forgive your husband and never again remind him of what happened with or without cause. But just do not play nobility, be sincere in your desire to forgive. In the end, what just does not happen in life, what kind of mistakes we do not make. Mankind throughout its history struggles to solve the problem: where the freedom of one person ends and the unfreedom of the other begins. Surely in your life you can find many different "sins". Think about what your personal qualities prevent the creation of a trusting, open atmosphere in the family. Maybe then it will be easier for you to look at the situation from the other side.
Most of these recommendations refer to a situation of short-term treason. The situation is different in the case when treason lasts a long time and turns into a double life. If this happens, then only you and your husband can decide how to further develop your family. The main thing is to remember that life can give many more ways out of situations, at first glance, hopeless. If you feel that you are not yet able to forgive and look for the right way to develop relationships, you can try some new forms of communication with your husband. Perhaps, he lacks emotional warmth or you need more frank communication.
In any case, even if it comes to a break, it is important to understand that you always have the opportunity to assert yourself in life, even without the help and support of an unfaithful husband.