And after two or three months of mental fatigue, the loved one suddenly suddenly disappears without even explaining anything. You are in a panic. "How could this happen, because I loved him with all my heart? Why? "- through tears whispering to her best friend, who is already tired to listen to the same thing and to calm you down. There is all this because, having met our half, we often behave inadequately and rush "into the pool with a head." It turns out that this is not only not recommended, but it is also forbidden. But what is allowed and even recommended to do, so that, loving with all my heart, not to destroy the relationship by obtrusiveness, we'll talk about this below.
Theoretical explanation of the mindlessness
If we consider love from the point of view of medicine, then this term refers to a mental disorder that is similar to narcotic or alcoholic intoxication. And let this interpretation does not surprise you, because the manifestation of symptoms is obvious. You become dependent and you want to be near to him every half hour, you get nervous when he does not call, and you are ready to spend your last savings for gifts to your beloved. This feeling makes you rejoice, like a little child, rapture, and sometimes causes a prolonged depression. And this is not surprising, because a lover loses his head, in the literal sense of the word. This happens under the influence of hormones, because of which the protein decreases, which, in turn, is responsible for the connection between the cells of the brain. As a result, all reactions are inhibited, and the lover turns into a fruit that can not reasonably think. A sensible decision is to pull yourself together, otherwise you risk losing your loved ones, never becoming one of them. So, let's start analyzing our own and other people's mistakes on the topic: how not to destroy the relationship by excessive obsession.
The desire to merge into one
After a month of romantic courtship, you start to think that you met your prince on a white horse. You consider him an ideal candidate for family life and the birth of children. Therefore, for a minute you do not want to part with your loved one. "We are so good together, I always dreamed of someone like you! "- do not get tired of repeating over and over again when you are together. And it does not matter, the beloved responds to these words with reciprocity or not, you are so sure that he is happy.
In order to become a half of one whole, to merge into one, you take over the interests of your man. Watch football with him and you know the names of all the players, although you were annoyed: "Why are such handsome men engaged in such nonsense? !! "But since then much has changed, and now you know not only the names of all players, but also their wives.
And you start drinking beer, which you just vomited before, besides, you can distinguish the taste of barley drink from wheat. And all this you do only in order to please your beloved and surprise his friends.
Tip: It's all great, but it would be better if your partner went for such actions for your sake. The problem is that because of your love you do not see the obvious. You just turn into a potential friend of your husband. But in fact earlier in your face he found a passionate, tender, feminine companion of life. Exit from the situation is a return to the old life, a hobby, girlfriends. You should understand that if you do not have hobbies other than him, then soon you will become uninteresting for your man, he will become bored with you.
"Heart will tell"
When we fall in love, we begin to believe in all kinds of nonsense such as "the heart will tell". Of course, it only tells us what we all want to hear. For example, you are already ripe for living together and dream of moving to your loved one. But he does not want to invite you at all. And then you decide that he is just afraid of frightening you, exerting pressure and one fine morning appear with suitcases under the door of the chosen one. At the moment of his slight shock, you make your way to the apartment, looking for a place for a house flower, brought with you. The shock state of the beloved is perceived as unexpected joy. And, without delaying the process of moving, you are interested in: "And where will my regiment be? "
Tip: Keep in mind that you are lucky if you stay and do not quarrel with the other half! In the worst case, they will expose you in a month or a week. This is due to the temperament of men, if you get any spineless man, then you can stay, but strong, temperamental men feel that they have to make such decisions on their own. Your perseverance can cause irritation and misunderstanding, because they do not like to force events. And if you create such situations, showing excessive obsession, it is possible that your loved one will throw you, as an extra ballast.
"Open book"
You think that between lovers there should be no secrets and tell him about everything. From when, for the first time, they fell in love and ending with a funny story about their first sex. Also, think that a loved one should know who and how to flirt with you today at work.
And in order not to lose contact with an expensive person, send him several sms every hour, demanding the same return from him. The semantic content of these SMS reports is how much you miss and love your "kitten". Also, your man must know what kind of pads you use, because if you get sick, you'll have to go to the store!
Advice: Do not litter your man's head with such nonsense. He not only should not, he does not need to know with whom and when you kissed and what gaskets you use. Otherwise you will exhaust yourself too quickly, and he will become bored with you.
The Perfect Man
You think your man is perfect and ready for everything. After long attempts, you can not find in it a single flaw. You love it when he plays the guitar, fries an omelette and erases. ... Well, the fact that yesterday he threw your suit into the washing machine, in his pocket was a driver's license, it's okay, because he wanted to help. "The main thing is that he nevertheless took up washing, and the document can be restored," you reason.
Tip: When women fall in love, they become unmanageable, able to greatly exaggerate the opportunities and dignity of their men. Paradoxically, this can destroy the relationship. Representatives of the fair sex tend to idealize their partners, create illusions, thus hiding from their eyes its essential shortcomings.