Life is changing
Sooner or later most girls get married. After entering into your life, a loved one has new, common family interests. In the circle of friends your friends and their girls were added. You make joint trips in the summer in kayaks. Fry shish kebabs in the winter forest with unchanged snowmen and a pile-small in a snowdrift. Hurry up to the concerts of your favorite bands - in a reckless company it's fun and cozy - all in pairs, young and energetic.
And here you are waiting for the child - a new change, expected and unexpected at the same time. Anxiety and doubt, changes in well-being and complexion, natural limitations of common sense and traditional suspiciousness. All this leads to certain changes in the previously habitual pastime and circle of communication. Dancing till the morning in a smoke-filled club, a cheerful crush on the rink and a number of other pleasant entertainments are now receding for a while.
You are less likely to meet, in the life of former bosom friends, events take place, to which you are no longer a party. Your self-esteem is offended, they are offended by your suspiciousness and excessive sensitivity. There comes the inevitable cooling in such cases. What to do? How to keep old and find new good friends to understand you with a half-word? Gaps in the usual friendly circle, caused by a temporary change in health, interests and opportunities, frighten, upset and require replenishment. Any changes in the familiar environment can not but grieve.
And in vain. Do not get upset and finally bury so dear once to your heart relationship. This situation will not last long. Many of your former friends, being in a similar position, will listen with special attention to your advice. They will return to your social circle again, but with their husbands and children. In the meantime, it is worthwhile looking for positive aspects in the changed situation of communication - new friends, who, as is known, do not happen much.
Where can I meet friends and acquaintances?
Friends and acquaintances can be found wherever you go. And your routes have also changed. So, now you are on schedule, you are, first of all, in a women's consultation. New place. Here you used to be once a year for a medical check-up and did not stay long. Now everything is different. You do not feel very confident, look at the walls "visual agitation" of a different artistic level and look forward to not too pleasant moments of inspection. Leave the unpleasant procedures their time. Look around. Pay attention to the neighbors - in the queues dating are tied at a fairly unconstrained. You always have time to go home, but the circle of acquaintances needs to be expanded. And for the sake of pleasure, and for the sake of "exchanging wisdom", and for moral support, and just to distract. Perhaps, the range of topics at first seem to you somewhat limited mainly in medical topics. What to do, you in the clinic. But this is only at first. Learning each other a little closer (and you will have to meet more than once), you will find other topics and options for communication. In the nearest cafeteria for a cup of tea, for example.
Go ahead. Where? Of course, to the store. According to many, pregnancy and the future birth of a child are an excellent occasion for a delicious shopping. Specify the addresses of specialized stores and the nearest cafes to know exactly where you can relax. And - go ahead! Here you will be supported by old friends, and new ones. And in the shops you will surely meet wonderful women. With them it will be possible to discuss not only the percentage composition of the fabric of a new summer dress or the convenience of a bandage of a particular firm. Who said that shopping is not an exciting adventure, if you approach it ironically, with taste and in good company?
A great time for new acquaintances will provide you with a nightly walk. If earlier your walks were limited to a wellness run with a player in the ears and a shopping trip, now you are leisurely strolling in the evenings. Take a closer look at the walkers in the courtyard, in the park. Not only to those who are in a similar position, but also to mothers with young children, pleasant old ladies on benches. The emergence of visual mutual sympathy, a few kind words enough to start a burdensome acquaintance. If the new acquaintance seems unnecessarily intrusive, you can always change the place and time of walks. To get acquainted with people close to you in the mindset, you can anywhere.
The Internet works for you
There is also an active communication on Internet sites. Do not confine yourself to visiting specialized communities, however fascinating the ideas discussed on them are. Be sensible, trying on yourself or some other popular in the Internet community idea. Browse several popular sites. Only based on the results of the information you have reviewed and after getting acquainted with the recommendations of those who checked the new idea on yourself, draw your conclusions. Pick up a block of information that is convenient for you, and only for you - as a unique and sensible person.
Pay attention not only to sites for expectant mothers. But also on the community on topics of family psychology or the household. It is always pleasant to communicate with those who are with you "in the same boat." Is it not pleasant to "wash the stones" together with my mother-in-law? Or to discuss options for housekeeping, to exchange recipes and texts of lullabies, just to support each other? And yet, with enthusiasm discussing at an international forum this or that topical issue, do not forget about the communities of your city. Communication with the big world is delightful and instructive. But it is so nice sometimes to get out of the "World Wide Web" and meet "in real life" with new acquaintances.
Do not get hung up!
Do not forget about previous interests and hobbies, about raising the level of professional qualification. View the main news and news blocks on the subjects you are interested in before. Perhaps, on the eve of maternity leave and troublesome time on parental leave, all previous hobbies seem insignificant and remote. Believe, however, that this is not so. And time flies quickly. And switching from one type of activity to another helps to be distracted from unnecessary far-fetched anxiety typical of many of us in this period. In addition, consciously concluding yourself in the family-children's subject, you are with joy and selflessness with your own hands create a "cage" from which you will later try to escape.
Is it worth it to consciously limit your life? Remember about those hobbies, which always lacked time in the old fussy life. Take advantage of life's proposed changes and make old dreams come true. At least at the level of gathering information about the occupation of your dreams, whether it's drawing with watercolor, playing a guitar or solving a theorem. The point is not so much as a result, but in maintaining ourselves at a proper positive level. And this is greatly facilitated by communication with enthusiastic people who are close to you in their work. In life there is still a lot of wonderful things, and pregnancy enriches your life. Is it worthwhile to use it as an excuse to justify traditional flax and a habitual attempt to leave everything good in life "for later"? And, as you know, new hobbies are new friends.
Do not count on constant good luck. Friends we find not so often in any period of life and we need them always. Possible and setbacks and disappointments, but also the discovery of amazing gifts in the form of a rare communication with like-minded people. It is worth trying to keep a warm relationship with old friends. In life there will be many more changes. And true friends remain if you take care of them a little. Perhaps you are not so often chosen together for a rock concert or a picnic. However, you can invite your friends in the evening to a special tea or pie according to the original recipe. Watch the new film, meet at a new exhibition, about which you have heard, and chat in a comfortable atmosphere.
A special topic is how to keep those friends, who are dear to you, but for now, or at all, is not going to acquire children? Note! Do not impose childless girlfriends relevant to you today topics for communication. These questions you will discuss in another circle. Ask only about what your friend is interested in and what united you before. Ask her about the problems and hobbies. But never allow yourself questions like: "Well, and when are you?" And the corresponding comments. It is understandable your desire to his girlfriend is as full of happiness as you. But your views on happiness are not always required to cope. Could not resist, and you are called, "incurred"? Sincerely and with a smile apologize for your incontinence, when you can finally stop. The fate of a friend is her business, and you have no right to tell her. But a friend should be given to feel the inappropriateness of remarks in the spirit: "Well, why did you need it?". Mutual respect is the best basis for friendship in any period of life.
If the state of health does not cause you special problems, continue the habitual way of life in the usual company. If the same dating does not bring the joy of communication - do not worry! If you try, you will again find good friends and many acquaintances. Keeping old friends and getting acquainted with new ones, your life will become even richer with joys and luxury of human communication.