Arguments for this are tales in which the characters always live happily ever after, and the clear examples of our grandparents who have lived together for decades.
But, often entering into adulthood, our dreams crumble like fragile house cards. In fact, besides good, in the world there is also evil, and for some reason it is more. Probably, therefore, loved ones are not always the only ones, but long does not mean happy, or vice versa. Realizing this fact, already arriving in a lawful marriage, we often face a certain dilemma: to stay in the family or not, and if so, how to live in the family, if there is no love?
A real feeling.
Talking about real sincere love, you should not confuse love and love. These two feelings are an integral part of each other, but are of a different nature. Usually, love becomes the beginning of the path to the birth of a deeper feeling, like love. For the period of falling in love there is a bouquet-candy period, a time when butterflies in the belly, pink glasses on the eyes, and everything is bright and colorful. The duration of love for all is individual, but it usually ends up to a year. According to statistics, it is during this period that most marriages are made up. Further on all the inspiring feeling comes a habit. Therefore, although we do not flutter as before, but from habit we continue to develop all the necessary hormones, in order to feel attachment to the person. Usually during this period we begin to evaluate not only the virtues, but also the shortcomings of the person who is near. At the same time, we perceive them quite easily and do not attach them to them of any special significance.
After the habit, the next stage is hatred. Not for nothing they say that from love to hate one step. Usually, such a state overtakes people when they are in the 2-3 year of marriage. Love hate implies a more active manifestation of dissatisfaction with something, the emergence of conflicts, increased irritation, rejection of virtues and focus on the partner's shortcomings. It seems that it's impossible to live in the family, and it's time to end the relationship. During this period, the greatest probability of divorce and major quarrels. Couples who have children can easily endure a period of so-called hatred, because they do not give more than their time and attention to each other, but to their beloved child. This period can also be regarded as the final stage of grinding.
Successfully experienced hatred turns into friendship. If there is no love in the family, but between the spouses there are warm and close relationships, it becomes easier, and more pleasant. Such changes are connected with the fact that the period of habituation has already passed, your life is equipped, and now you calmly perceive everything that is happening around. Just this period, the family appears to have stability in the moral, and that is especially important in the material plan. Spouses communicate more with each other, by this time children become independent and parents have time for themselves. In terms of duration, a period called "friendship" probably occupies most of the married life of the couple.
But after friendship comes what can be called real love.
So, do not rush to say that there is no love, maybe you just have not reached it yet?
"no love".
Of course, it also happens that the marriage, created at the stage of love, turns out to be a mistake, and the feelings pass as soon as the pink mist comes off. Such a marriage is just doomed to perish, because sooner or later one of the spouses will find a new hobby, and it's simply impossible to live with a person who is not interested in you. Unsuccessful is also considered a marriage of convenience. Patience is next to an unattractive person, few people have enough. But there are exceptions, which only confirm the rule. If your marriage, really turned out to be a marriage, it is better to give each other freedom sooner than later and not to bring mental anguish.
Often, many women and men are stopped by the presence of children, or public opinion. But if you understand, your children will not get the heat they need, seeing your indifference every day. Therefore, to live in a family without love, children should not. Let them better know that there is a dad and a mother who love them, and feel your love, even if separate. Believe that when they grow up, they will understand and support you. And the public and attention should not be paid, everyone has a life in which there are not so few problems, so you prefer to solve your problems, as it is profitable for you.
A pity.
Sometimes there are cases when one of the spouses does not feel special feelings continues to exist in the family, only out of pity for the second half. Like, so much time together, and how he (she) without me, and continue to endure, so much power is enough while striking at work, hobbies, companies, not feeling the full joy of life. Such a relationship can be safely compared to a suitcase without a handle - and it is hard to bear, and to throw it is a pity. By such behavior, a loving spouse or spouse shows, as it were, a manifestation of nobility, in relation to a still loving partner. But on the part of the latter everything looks no less sad. Have you ever experienced unrequited love? So, is the conscious causing of spiritual pain can be attributed to the list of noble intentions?
Therefore, if there are no feelings, it is worthwhile to think it over thoroughly, and to make a single right decision. Of course, you can think of "one thousand and one ways", how to continue living in the family, if there is no love, but is it worth it? We are given one life, and it is unlikely that we would voluntarily sacrifice ourselves. If there is no love, it is better to stay on good terms, but at a distance than to be around and quietly hate.
Remember that this is your life, and how it will be decided only by you.