An interesting metamorphosis is obtained: when your husband was just a boyfriend, you so longed to like him, that by heart all the laws of psychology remembered by heart. Listened attentively to him, assented to him, was interested in his affairs, dressed up for him and thought only of him. He was the best, the most loved, the cleverest, the kindest, the most beautiful, the most ... And this noodle fell on his ears so thickly that he eventually came to the conclusion that he needed to get married. Urgently. On you.
However, before he could cross the threshold of the registry office, cheerfully picking up your carcass, dressed in lace and taffeta, immediately appeared claims. Not that they were not there before. Just now, feeling like a tiger tamer who finally got a whip and a hose in the hands of a marriage certificate and a stamp in the passport, you decided it was time to act.
Armed with the recommendations of women's magazines on the training of a predatory animal of the breed "husband" and enlisting its own ideas about how to behave properly married man, you vainly try to change the unchanged and miss the eyes, ears and souls of dignity, which you previously so appreciated it.
But you just need nothing. Do not bother, smile more often, try to look good, and most importantly - do not forget to extol its best qualities. That is, to praise her husband. After all, only at first glance it seems that this stern inhabitant of offices can not tolerate "calf tenderness" and is ready to commit heroic deeds all day long just like that. But in fact your betrothed is like a tender flower, which without a stimulus in the form of praise, as without good watering, will soon wither and cease to commit not only heroic deeds, but deeds in general.
Let him not a little bunting and not darling, and does not always praise you. So start the first. And the ice-cream, just touched by your settled and worn-out relations, will slowly begin to melt by itself.
You do not have anything to praise him for? Really it happens? I would not believe it! Read the list of possible qualities for praise, continue it to your taste and count how many of them you can apply to your own husband.
FOR WHAT IT, OWN, HONOR ...
So, here is an approximate list of qualities for which it can and should be praised:
• He is smart.
What's the difference that it's not Einstein, but how well he understands politics!
• He is beautiful.
What? Bald and fat? But what are his eyes!
• It is economic.
Well, what if the last time he washed the dishes, while still a teenager. But after much persuasion, he still took out the trash can!
• It's neat.
Never wear the same socks twice. Despite the fact that you have to wash them.
• He is thrifty.
How so, mean? What are you doing !!! It is thrifty and economical, caring about the safety of the family budget. Oh, he likes spending money? Well then:
• He is generous.
And would you like to go to the other end of the city for tomatoes for a ruble for the sake of economy?
• He's attentive.
If you are upset that instead of giving you a birthday present, he gave you money for him, then do not be upset. It would be worse if he even forgot about him.
• He is a great lover.
This truth is also proved by the fact that after sex, he, tired of hard work to give you pleasure, immediately falls asleep.
• He is sociable.
Although he devotes too much time to friends, there is a hope that among them, finally, useful ones will also appear.
• He's judicious.
Some call him a bore, but he just tries to get into the heart of things!
• He is enterprising.
It's just that he has a black streak. But you know that he will succeed!
• He is talented.
Let contemporaries have not yet appreciated this, but they will certainly appreciate the descendants!
• He is single-minded.
Truth strives every day to new, opposite in direction, goals. But these are trifles.
• He's an excellent father.
Children love him so much! (Maybe because they rarely see it?)
• He is diplomatic.
Instead of calling his mother-in-law a fool, he simply left, slamming the door.
• He's honest.
Truly and frankly said that you went to the gym to lose weight. But he could have kept silent and started a quiet lover.
• He does not smoke (he does not drink, he does not prick, he does not play sweepstakes, he does not lead girls) ...
Do you think he does not do it, because he does not protect your nerves, but your own health? Then this is a new occasion to praise:
• He so cherishes his health.
Therefore, he tries not to waste his efforts and spends his evening on the couch. And then - in the family circle. And, finally:
• I'm so proud of him!
Is it not true? Then it is completely unclear why you are still with him.
FOR WHAT YOU DO NOT HAPPEN YOUR HUSBAND
Praise is first of all art. Therefore, it needs the right time, place, good taste and tact. It should be specially noted that the most effective praise is the public praise. But this potent remedy can appear as a balm to the soul of your faithful, as well as poison, capable of completely poisoning your relationship.
Here you can take as a guide to action about this position: praise in society is necessary for what is included in the value system of these people. If you have a crowd gathered at the guests of her husband's animated friends who imagine themselves as playboys, it would be a foolish gesture to praise his economy. Maybe friends will understand your desire and even carry it to the account of your female perception of the world. But your lover will feel like a complete idiot and feel the condescending views of "adult uncles". But the jaws of these same friends will surely fall away when you mention that you are tired of beating off your husband from numerous female fans.
Do not also focus on things that are insignificant for your man. If he hates the household, the compliment "you washed your dishes so well" will be perceived as a mockery and a hint that he does not know anything about washing dishes. In this case, the praise for the dishes can sound only in the context of "you all do great and the dishes are a superfluous proof."
One more thing. Do not overdo it! If your husband really has a black band, then he needs praise, understanding, and support as air. If it is long behind, then to extol your own husband without any measure - the risk that he will seriously consider himself the owner of all the "incriminated" virtues. And then it may seem to him that next to such an intelligent, generous, affectionate, enterprising, attentive, wonderful husband must be a completely different wife. That is not you. Let your betrothed feel your sincere attention, but all the same in the man's head at times you have to sweat doubts that you are distorting somewhere and something you are not telling.
In a word, be a creative person and often find a place for a kind word. And therefore, I wish you happiness in your personal life!