As to how much the divorce affects the spouses there is a huge number of opinions. Therefore, before you are going to marry and the more you get divorced, you should think about at least ten times.
Divorce factors
The main types of influence of divorce on spouses depend on the factors that led to the divorce:
- Attitude towards divorce by the spouses (neutral, negative, painful);
- Features of divorce, for example, its shape, depth, duration, number of participants that are involved in the divorce process (friends, lovers, parents, children);
- Material side and division of property during the divorce (the problem of partitioning the living space);
- The influence of moral principles (the health of one of the spouses, the emotional state, age, the problem of who will have children with).
Influence on spouses in terms of sexual non-equality
It used to be assumed that a woman is much more difficult to survive a divorce, unlike a man. This is due to the fact that it is much more difficult for a lady to raise one child, find a job with sufficient funding, create a new family, etc. But over time, psychologists came to the common opinion that a man needs a family more than a woman.
A man after divorce has a high chance to remarry, but often divorced representatives of the stronger sex can not find a new companion. The influence of divorce proceedings significantly reduces the male budget, in addition, a man is experiencing immense moral damage associated with stress due to the fact that he can not see the children. Having lost his role after the divorce, the man tries not to express his experiences and even if he initiated the divorce, he still experiences devastation. All this depends on the duration of the state in the marriage and the degree of choice of control at the time of leaving this role.
A woman in such a period begins to acutely feel a lack of love and blame herself for it. She faces emotional difficulties much more intensively, but quickly comes to psychological balance. By the way, according to the social stereotype, divorced women have a lower social status than a married woman. Among other things, initially close people start supporting a woman, and then they distance themselves from it, which increases the feeling of loneliness and can cause depression.
The man, for the time being, closes in himself, and then "gets off" with a feeling of prolonged dissatisfaction. Men tend to have more opportunities to forget themselves (hobbies, alcohol, sports). Often, such a "escape from yourself" can drag on. In other words, the whole depth of the consequences of divorce for the spouses depends on the unexpectedness of this process. The one who was offered to divorce gets a big injury.
New views on life
For ex-spouses it is characteristic to ignore the personal role in the conflict, dumping all the blame on the other. But more adequate and able to soberly assess the situation people make the right conclusions from previous failures and behave in a second marriage, if it happens, tactfully and reasonably.
Men, who in the first marriage had a strongly emotional spouse, who always demanded a lot of attention, for the second marriage, as a rule, choose a quiet and modest companion. Or, those men who were married to an overly caring woman, because of constant guardianship and feeling like a child, will choose that woman as a new wife who is mentally weak and needs herself in care and care. This will allow the man fully to feel himself mature and to develop in himself a sense of responsibility, which he lacked before.
The advantages of entering into a new marriage are based on the fact that under the influence of the events that happened, both ex-spouses no longer base their relationships on "eternal" love and romance, and perceive everything much more rationally. By the way, remembering all the bitterness that the finale of the first marriage brought, both a woman and a man are very grateful for all the good moments that they could give a second marriage. Therefore, they try to keep it much more actively and get full happiness from it.