Friendship is a very important feeling. It is based on almost all the relationships in our lives. But is it worth it to be friends with the person you love?
Mutual love
In order to speak on this topic, you need to divide the friendship with your loved one into two categories: when he loves you and when he thinks of you as only a friend. Let's start with the first category.
If you are meeting with a loved one, then in this case, friendship is the perfect complement to your relationship. The fact is that a friend is a person whom we all trust and are able to treat indulgently those situations when he is mistaken. Unfortunately, this is often not enough in a couple's relationship. It seems that there is love and passion, but there is not enough mutual trust and understanding. And all because people can not be friends. In general, they say that the best couples are obtained from the best friends. And it is true. Delov is that when initially a man and a woman are friends, they get to know each other real. Before one another we do not try to seem better than we are, hide our flaws and so on. It is friends that people most often fully reveal their souls. Therefore, when a stronger feeling suddenly breaks out between friends of different sex, it is much easier for them to build relationships. They already know what to expect from each other, who wants what and so on. But when people were not friends, it often happens that over time they are disappointed in each other, because at first they tried too hard to show off one another, giving out what they wanted for real, but when the relationship began to develop, the need for it seemed to disappear, and it turned out , that the beloved person has a lot of shortcomings, which is very difficult to reconcile.
The friendship between a man and a woman who meet or is married is necessary and important. Therefore, you should always try to be for your lad, not only a desirable woman, but also a good friend. Many girls, as well as the boys, complain that their halves are hiding something and sharing with their friends, but bear it. This is not surprising, because a friend can calmly listen, suggest, while not being offended and "inflating the fly from an elephant." Avot favorite person instead gets angry, make scandals, invent something, which in fact is not and so on. A friend can always calmly express his dissatisfaction with his behavior, and then discuss everything constructively and not be afraid that he will leave in tears, saying that you will part. And the second half can quite act like this.
Therefore, if you want to develop a healthy and trustful relationship between you and your loved one, learn to be his friend. Remember that he has his personal space. Do not forget that he is a living person, which means that he is far from ideal, like every one of us. Try to look at his actions soberly and do not assume that he owes you everything. That's exactly what friends do, if they are, of course, good and real.
Each person needs a loyal and reliable friend, he can share everything, without fear that they will not understand him, they will condemn the thieves. And if for a loved one such a friend becomes exactly you, then the relationships will be "five with plus." He will not have to dissect anything, as he will know that you will understand and support him. He will spend more time with you and more often take his friends to the company, as he can speak with you. Remember that passion can not live forever. Early or late it runs low, and then, if there is no friendship and mutual support between a man and a woman, relations also come to their finish.
Non-reciprocal love
A slightly different situation develops when one person is friendly and the other loves. In this case, first of all, you need to decide whether you can be a true friend for a loved one, regardless of whether he will end up with you or not. Far from everyone has a great heart and strong nerves to watch as a favorite building relationship with someone else. Therefore, there is nothing terrible and reprehensible in order to renounce friendship with a loved one. If he really wants you better, then everything will be understood. The fact is that such friendship for many is a real stone, which does not allow to move on. Man constantly hopes that he will be seen not only as a friend and not trying to build his personal life. In the end, he simply lives in the shadow of a loved one and voobscheene thinks about his future.
When you are trying to be friends with someone you love, think about whether you can not spoil relations with others. Some people, using their friendship, start to plot their loved ones, destroy their relations with others and so on. This not normal. If you really love a person, let him go and live your life, if you can not look at his happiness with others. Otherwise, there will be no peace for him, nivam. He will suffer because his personal life does not add up, but you will begin to accumulate anger and irritation due to the fact that he still sees you as a friend.
Of course, there are those people who put the personal happiness of a loved one above their experiences and sufferings. In this case, you can. Only need to accustom yourself to the fact that a loved one is only a friend and nothing more. If you see that you really need him and feel that friendship with him is better for you than nothing, then be friendly. It also happens that the love gradually turns into friendship in its pure form. That is, passion passes, and affection, respect and admiration of a person remain. This will happen with you. The main thing is not to make any sacrifices. Decide for yourself what is real happiness for you. Perhaps this is truly your one-time love for life and it will be easier and more comfortable for you to be at least a friend of this person than to build relationships with someone you simply can not fall in love with so much.
If you chose friendship with your loved one, learn to enjoy what you have. Even if he does not like you, he in fact values you, considers with your opinion, rejoices together swamis - and this is already fine. Many do not even have this. In any case, being next to a loved one, we get positive emotions. Therefore, in the case when you chose friendship with your loved one, try to enjoy what you have.
Many people continue to believe and hope that they will be loved. And in its own good. If only a loved one is worthy of their feelings and expectations. Next to a good person, whom we love, we want to stay better, achieve something. Therefore, such a friendship can bring fruit, just do not need to manically believe that sooner or later this person will be yours. Let everything be decided by fate. Indeed, there are times when friendship still grows into love. And it will be simply wonderful, if your case turns out to be so.
But in any case, to be friends or not to be friends with your loved one is your choice. It should not depend on him or on others. You must decide how you will be better, how you will feel happier: being a friend for a loved one or leaving him forever.