A young family is always a great role, it is the beginning of a new, beautiful event, a big change in the life of both partners. But in each family there are problems and conflicts, because the interaction of people becomes very tight, and the conflict itself sometimes has the character of detente, which we are given family relations. Article: "Psychological causes of conflict in a young family" will tell you about the acute angles of relations in the newly born cell of society with the aim of avoiding them in the future.
In their essence, conflicts can be open (utterances, cries, direct quarrels), as well as closed (ignoring, resentment, silence). The goal of conflicts is usually the desire to achieve their interests, assert themselves, satisfy their own psychological desires, etc. Conflict conflicts most often are quarrels, disputes, accusations ... The form, manifestations and causes of each may be different. In this article, the main psychological causes of conflict in a young family will be named.
In general, it is possible to look for their roots together with the basic human needs, from which they often occur. These include: sex, food, communication ... Conflicts will occur when there is a threat of lack of satisfaction of one of them.
From this conclusion: conflicts can arise when difficulties begin or there is a threat of dissatisfaction with our desires and expectations. In the family there are several "crisis" periods, when relations become aggravated, and the risk of conflict increases.
The first of these will be the earliest stage of the relationship, when the "I" perceptions break down, and the "we" arise in the mind of the couple. This is a period of adaptation, the couple learns to live together, love and romance disappear, and in their place comes everyday life, an entirely different way of life, each reveals itself from the other side, reveals its true self. The first period of family relationships is severe, the risk of divorce is very high.
The second period is associated with the birth of a child. There are problems associated with moral and physical exhaustion, at which moment different views and positions of life may be encountered.
The third period is the "middle" of the marital age. Partners reconsider their lives, noticing in it more everyday life, routine and greyness, there is a "oversaturation" of each other.
The causes of conflicts at different stages may be the psychologically sexual incompatibility of partners, the inability to express their opinions and provide information about their psychological needs to the partner.
The same cause of conflicts may be dissatisfaction in communication, caress, help, support, disrespect for the feelings of one of the partners, suppression of his "I".
For example: One of the causes of conflict in a young family can be excessive drinking of one of them. In this case, a partner who abusers alcohol, violates public norms, not only loses his health, but also separates from the rest of the world, including from marriage. The conflict arises from the fact that one of the spouses is addicted to satisfying only their needs, expressing a complete lack of understanding of the second and ignoring his feelings and needs.
Conflicts can arise from the reasons for the incompatibility of cultures and traditions of each of the spouses, the lack of a family budget, and, simply, because of the different attitudes towards leisure.
Knowing the causes of conflicts, we can deduce ways to reduce the risk of their occurrence, prevent them and minimize them. In order to create fewer quarrels in the family, one must learn to communicate, because being a good spouse is a great skill: you have to work on yourself, overcoming your egocentrism, focusing on the wishes of the other person. After all, marriage is a union of two people who are now one whole, from which it is worth forgetting about the manner of taking care of oneself and one's desires. Remember that a partner needs you, in your support, attention and love.
More trust in each other in all matters, to a minimum it is necessary to reduce jealousy. Do not forget that if the husband chose you - it already means that you are the only and loved one for him, that it was you, not others, he fell in love with, and marriage - this is proof. Do not doubt yourself and your attractiveness, because understated or inflated self-esteem is also the cause of conflict, both with a partner and with yourself.
Respect yourself and your spouse, be interested in him and his hobbies, admire his achievements, praise him and share his priorities. Make surprises, spend more time together - family life can open you a lot of pleasures and surprises, do not and do not take it gray and boring. There are always a lot of ways to diversify it and strengthen your relationship.
Watch yourself and your development, do not run yourself, just keep an eye on your appearance. Be caring and caressing about her husband, but just show that you need him, because he is the best for you.
But if all the same conflicts happen, you need to be able to solve them. Here the main thing is not to attract strangers, to be open and honest, to say only what you think and feel. Do not hide information, be afraid to say the main thing, do what other people advised, because only you need to make decisions in your affairs.
Conflict is best resolved during a conversation in which each of the participants tries to understand each other, help each other and find a compromise. Do not focus only on your opinion. If you are sure that only your position will be the solution in this situation, objectively and, most importantly, calmly explain why you think so, and why each of you needs this decision, instead of shouting and insisting on your opinion , for a reason, because "I so want."
Finally, it is worth remembering that all conflicts are solved, and their appearance should not be afraid. They do not indicate that your union is collapsing, or that you do not fit together. But nevertheless, each pair needs to know what are the psychological causes of conflicts in the young family. Conflicts in more or less their number are characteristic for all families, the main thing, learn to cope with them. Remember that the welfare of your family depends only on you.