The questions are really difficult, there can be a lot of opinions here, as each individual has experience of their own relationships, each pair starts a relationship in their own way. Are there any "seriousness" criteria that are common to all, and how to identify them? Consider the following examples.
Is it possible to call serious relations between an elderly millionaire and a young girl? Or the relationship between adolescents? Most of us are likely to respond negatively. Indeed, in the first case, calculation and mercantilism are striking, and in the second - the desire to look older in the eyes of peers, to experience new impressions. What is missing in the examples of such relations in order that they could be called serious? No matter how banal it may sound, but, of course, there is not enough love in the broadest sense of the word. After all, love is a complex concept: it is passion, harmony, and general plans for the future. It is important reciprocity, respect, the desire to be together always and to give each other love for many years.
Serious relationships always begin with love - mutual and unselfish. In them there is no place for calculation, mutual use and selfishness. What will happen next - a romantic date and a wedding or a civil marriage - is not so important. The success of the union lies precisely in the sincerity of feelings, respect for oneself and for one's partner, the desire to give and give to a loved one more than to receive in return.
Relationships will be successful if the couple is going to them with all responsibility, both are mature not only in terms of age, but also have clear common plans for the future, a true value system. Many psychologists now write that the path of the couple is the only possible and correct way to realize oneself, to reveal one's essence and to improve spiritually. After all, the relationship of two loving hearts is an invaluable experience of love, happiness, self-realization, and perhaps the creation of a family, motherhood and paternity.
In modern society, for some reason, it is not accepted to teach the art of living together and serious relationships. However horrible this may sound, most women go on a serious relationship, because a man is a defender and a source of income. Accordingly, for men, a woman is free sex, delicious food, comfort, clean clothes ... It is not surprising that most breaks and divorces occur 2-3 years after the beginning of the relationship. The passion for this time fades away and it begins just mutual use. They did not think, did not know how, did not know that relationships also need to learn and they led to marriage in a certain sense of the word. In this case, a serious relationship should begin with the work on yourself, and not with attempts to change the partner. Change yourself is not easy, but you can not change the other. If a person can not understand this, he will always bang his forehead about such problems. Life is organized competently and harmoniously, and if the problem is not solved, it is repeated again and again, each time intensifying. Therefore, if you are pursued with failures in your personal life or you are alone - it's time to sit down and think: what am I doing wrong? There is a mass of literature, trainings and seminars that can help change life, restore relationships.
It is not always possible to call a serious and lasting relationship. After all, many live together by habit, because of children or housing. Relations should be measured not by the number of years lived together, but by quality or result. Therefore, in order not to regret later, put before yourself specific goals and objectives from the very beginning: "Why should I have this relationship?", "What do I want from them?", "What will they give me and my beloved?" If the answers to such questions are weighty for you, and not only your favorite "I" will appear in them, then, most likely, you are on the right track.