How to avoid punishment when raising a child?
Education without punishment is formed from several principles.
- Recognition of the uniqueness of the child, his desires, feelings and needs. In life it can mean only one thing. Instead of scolding and shouting at his child for his improper behavior, parents should think about why it appeared. If to say in simple words, the reason for the child's bad behavior is his inner discomfort, excitement and emotion that good parents should find and eliminate.
- Respect for the values of the child. When parents recognize the identity of the baby, they accordingly recognize that they have their own values, even if they do not overlap with their own. Parents who love their children should be interested in the most insignificant things that do not seem like a trifle to them, they must understand that children have the right to make mistakes, they can have their own opinion on any account, even if it is erroneous. Such an approach will help to form a child's own value system, teach him to analyze, the child will be able to find his mistakes and correct them.
- To improve the effectiveness of education without the use of violence, parents will have to learn to recognize their mistakes and understand that perfect people do not exist and they are not an exception. We will have to constantly review our methods of education, our system of demands and claims that parents apply to the child, to make certain adjustments for improvement in them. If the child begins to be capricious and protest against your rules - think about how fair they are in this or that situation. A child may refuse to play by your rules, due to dissatisfaction with his own interests.
- One of the most important and necessary rules that allows you to bring up education without the use of punishments is the love of your child. It is very important to show your child his love, no matter how old he is, to express it through bodily touches - pats, embraces, etc. Love will play a big role in the upbringing of the child. Already in the future, he will easily communicate with others around him and find friends.
- Set the rules in your family. Make a list of rules that all family members are required to comply with, and try to bring them to the child. Watch for the fact that there are no contradictions in your list with your own words, which the child may not so interpret. For example, if a child is forbidden to eat a sweet certain time, then it is forbidden to all. Sister, parents, and no matter where - at home or at my grandmother's home. It should be remembered that the contradictions will disorient the child, discourage the formation of self-control, and most importantly develop unwanted behavior in him. He can become a sneak and strive for dishonesty.
- Give a good example. From birth to adolescence, parents are a kind of authority for their children. That's why you should take advantage of this situation and give your child a particle of his behavior and knowledge. You can not instill in your child the love of reading if he sees you sitting in front of the TV, watching your favorite show. You do not teach the child to respect the elders, if you yourself allow impartial expressions of neighbors to the ladder and teachers. Your child will never clean the room and keep the house clean, if around a mess and confusion. When a child imitates his parents - this is a natural desire. Therefore, if you have set yourself the task of raising a child without causing him discomfort, think about what example you give your behavior.
- It is necessary to give up education with the use of force and authority. If the parents behave aggressively towards the child, when he begins to behave in an inappropriate way, for example, take toys from other children, tear and scatter things, they will achieve that the child by all means will avoid their control and finally get out of the observation . If a child does not have enough patience and his psyche can not withstand such an attack, he can turn into a person who never shows a character and initiative. In any case, the pressure on the child will drive all the difficulties of the baby, which lie at the base of inappropriate behavior, far inward. It will only be the appearance of solved problems.
- Follow the sequence. Before you raise a child without causing violence, you should educate yourself. On the shoulders of parents falls a huge burden. They have to clearly understand the value system, know all the subtleties and nuances of the educational process, learn to cope with negative emotions, develop and grow in the personal plan with the child. All parents who want to raise a polite and confident child, will have to develop a remarkable patience and self-discipline. Only with this approach can you achieve the desired results.
In order for the upbringing to be truly successful, the results achieved have been bearing fruit for a long time, and will have to sweat over yourself with a joke. It is necessary day after day to build a trust relationship with your child. Gradually, you will be able to come to a mutual understanding, learn to understand each other with a half-word, build with him a trusting relationship based on gratuitous love.