He was used to the fact that any desire is fulfilled immediately, but otherwise - a cry, smears on the face of tears and snot and absolutely demoralized relatives. Your case? Our congratulations: you have a small manipulator and a blackmailer. Most likely, once you let slip, or under the influence of circumstances, you have lost your vigilance - and strictly set aside 15 minutes before the TV stretch for a good two hours absorbing everything that is horrible (you have to take something to do with a child when you talk with a friend), forbidden chips are bought regularly (what else to please the baby, when you have to linger at work), dressing a little prince or princess becomes your sole concern (well, you're always late!). You gradually expand the boundaries of what is permitted, and the wise scion enjoys it. Depending on how you react to his actions, your child also builds his behavior. He perfectly knows the art of manipulation, resorting to it whenever he wants to achieve something.
Where does that come from
The brightest types of small "puppeteers" are described below. Do you recognize your "sweetie"? We need to think about how to put it in its place.
Napoleon the stubborn
Creepy obstinate, stern commander, terrible owner. All toys are just his, to share with someone a candy - hysterics, but to appropriate someone else's - as there is nothing to do, non-observance of the rules invented by him is fraught with beatings. Clear claims to leadership by force. As a rule, he has no friends, because of what he is angry, trying unsuccessfully to impose his society. Type is more common among boys, but the "girlish" version is not easier. What to do? Explain to the kid that you can achieve what you want only if you learn to give in. Sorry to share toys? Let it determine those that can still be provided for general use. Do you want to pokomandovat? Think of a game in which the young "commander" will rule - in turn with the rest of the participants. The kid will understand that good relations with other children strengthen his authority, and he will like it.
Reva-cow
It seems dependent and helpless: bumping into the slightest obstacle, with a plaintive voice, he begs for help. She wants to be comforted, to solve something that can please her. What to do? It is not necessary to agree to additional indulgences only because tears are about to pour. Thus, you yourself encourage in the crypt infantile and passive. Agree: you try it yourself, but here I will help you. And praise for any success.
Chameleon
At home, the baby is alone, in the kindergarten another, for a walk in the park the third ... He knows how to be a good child if he wants to achieve something, and becomes a perfect detachment if punishment can be avoided.
Blackmailer
His behavior is a chain of actions called "What will I do for it?". Remove the toys - only if you give a chocolate, brush your teeth - if you allow a half hour to play computer "shooters."
What to do? Establish clear rules and follow them rigorously. No concessions! You can make a list of punishments that will follow in case of disobedience.
Slaveholder
Strongly attached to one of the relatives and does not agree to let him go a step. This seems like a manifestation of love, in fact - a sophisticated manipulation. Often children behave this way in relation to grandparents, and those "neutralized" by grandsons-sublime, all allow them.
King and retinue
Parents, exhausted by the antics of a small tyrant, relieve themselves of the responsibility for raising a child: "We did not learn the poem, we did not go to training, because he was indulging ..." The child is not yet able to imagine the consequences of his actions, the task of the elders is to show him on them. Establish the correct hierarchy in the family, and if you have decided something, then you must insist on your own. At first, "defeated king" will fight for power. Be adamant! If the baby, wishing to achieve his, arranged a fit of hysteria, do not try to persuade him - this you only provoke a small ruffian. Strictly say that it does not intend to fulfill its demands, and leave the room (it is better to "conquer" space without witnesses, so that the crumbs do not have the temptation to work for the public). Communicate with sonolili daughter on an equal footing, avoid orders, but not syusyukai. Give him freedom of choice: what to eat, what to wear, what book to read. The kid must feel: his opinion is important to you. To your words, he will also treat with great respect.
Stop me!
The raging kid subconsciously needs to be stopped. He enjoys permissiveness and at the same time suffers from the fact that everyone tears up irritation on him. He does not know how to obey the general rules, because of what he feels like an outcast in a kindergarten or school, he finds his friends with difficulty. Help him change before it's too late.
When to roar is not interesting
Recently, my formerly obedient and affectionate little son seemed to be replaced! I read the advice of a psychologist that during "outbursts of anger" you need to switch the attention of the baby to something positive. Say, instead of dangerous, but such "right" knife-forks in the kitchen, I offer pans, in which you can knock and fold the lids in them. Another means to ease the inconsolable roar of the baby is the load-unloading of the washing machine. In the process, we study the names of the garments, their color, size. This method also helps: the son screams and stomps his feet, and I silently sit down on the floor and start building a fortress with cubes and towers and bridges along which I drive cars. The son pauses and connects to the case.
Age of stubbornness
"The Seven-Star Crisis of Three Years" is a series of symptoms characteristic of the behavior of children of this age.
This period the family will simply have to survive: it happens to almost everyone.
1. Negativism. The kid is constantly dissatisfied with something.
2. Stubbornness. It stands on its own until the last thing out of principle.
3. Stubbornness. Proposals of adults perceive with hostility.
4. Self-will. "I myself!", Not otherwise, although the matter is beyond the forces.
5. Protest riot. Consciously provokes conflicts.
6. Depreciation. Rejects everything, even what he loved before, just to do something in defiance of someone.
7. Despotism. Strives to lead and rule in the family.