But in life, not all the stories follow this typical line of the female novel. A lot depends on the characters of both - a loving and deceiving girl and a deceived man. And even more - from the random elements of this mosaic. We sometimes do not think about them and do not notice their influence, but this, like in the laws of physics, does not cancel their actions.
Cheating for ...
Benefits
Who wants to be interesting not in itself, but only because of some benefits? Of course, no one! Therefore, what is the result of the relationship that began with deception on this basis is understandable. As soon as the deceiver (or deceiver) reveals insidious plans to get a new job, a more prestigious position, or they will be asked to rewrite an apartment in their name, the partner will for sure think. We all do not want to be used and we break off the relationship, tied to self-interest as soon as possible.
On the other hand, no one excludes a mutually beneficial partnership. In this case there is not only the giving and receiving parties. Everyone benefits from cooperation or mutual exchange. Even in a marriage of convenience, there is not only one (or occasionally one) who benefits financially, but also a second partner who sees in these relations the benefit and pleasure, care or something else.
Therefore, before building castles on the sand ("I'll marry a millionaire!"), It's worthwhile to think carefully about what you really can offer him. After all, we all remember where the relationships that started with deception lead to, and we ourselves try to avoid the possibility of being deceived.
Deception from ethical considerations
Here you can include a relatively small lie about where was the dearest and adored, with whom she communicated, and more serious. When the relationship is just beginning, each partner tries to look better than he is. Of course, "Twitter" about how we like to cook or scrub the floors, that we are not yet ready for the "dubious happiness of motherhood," is useful. The man, having relaxed and having calmed down on this account, can also call in marriage!
But you can not lie without consequences if you are certain that a small "kick" is enough, and the partner will reconsider his views. For example, think about marriage, children, take your (different from his beliefs) faith or the presence of a sick aunt on the content. And if you bet on the fact that a man who has fallen in love without looking back will help with work, study, maintenance of elderly relatives or raising children from the first marriage - stay. It is better to imagine him everything as it is or even a little worse. "Embellishing", you can easily "finish the game", touching the sensitive strings of the soul or repeating some unpleasant situation.
If your chosen partner has already been married, knows firsthand what children are and how much effort they require, it is easier to "confess" immediately than to hide and hide the truth. After all, relations that started with deception, already from the very beginning, are fraught with a "wormhole", and what the secrecy or promises of what you can not give is immediately clear.
When is deception useful?
Starting with a deceitful attitude, of course, is bad. But there are several spheres of life in which not only is not harmful, but it is even useful to deceive the future partner, the man with whom you meet or communicate.
First, it's sex. Even the most tolerant men hate when they are easily told (and even worse - in detail) about previous husbands, lovers, casual connections. The position of the woman in this case is clear: even if she is far beyond thirty, there were only a few men. Fingers of one hand is enough, and with a margin to count them! And, of course, the relationship was long and serious, but ... And then it's better to stop and sigh, so you do not have to tell the details.
Next - passion. No man in his right mind "pozaritsya" a frigid woman. Therefore, even if you visit a psychotherapist or fairly calmly treat sex, it's easier to play "better less, but better", with an indispensable promise (hints) of something feyerical and mind-blowing.
And, of course, the future mother-in-law. According to her, our future husbands and candidates for boyfriends evaluate our chances. But if you turn into a cook or a cleaner, a model or a ballerina is quite possible, then you will not be able to change your mother. Therefore, "feed" him information that your mother is wonderful, that's only more caring than you would like. In that case, you will not lie, and you will not frighten the gentleman.
What is better to say in advance, than to get out of an ugly situation?
- about children,
- the ex-husband,
- sick or needy relatives,
- own severe diseases,
- religion,
- Plans for life (who for you men - the meaning of life, comrades-in-arms or temporary hobbies).
What can you lie about more or less painlessly, but with the mind?
That
- you recently broke up, but have not yet "licked wounds"
- you need help, and from the relationship you expect problems to be solved,
- you meet with several men in parallel and have not yet decided on the chosen one,
- go to a business meeting with a man (in this respect, many boyfriends have their own, sometimes inexhaustible fantasies),
- you recently suffered from a venereal disease, but have already recovered,
- you have temporary health problems,
- you have nowhere to live, and you plan to move to it.
And finally
If you are deceiving a man, then remember not only what leads to the relationship started with deception, but also that you, too, can become a victim. Alfonso and just amateurs to solve some of the problems for someone else's account do not doze, so keep your ears open!