Often, moms and grandmothers from early childhood suggest to their daughters that the girl should be modest. Then growing up, these girls do not know how to get rid of this modesty. They do not know what to do to prevent them from living.
On the one hand, there is nothing wrong with modesty, especially for a woman. It is associated with upbringing and politeness. The very nature of a man lays the courage and activity, and in a woman passivity, modesty and poise. On the other hand, excessive modesty, uncertainty annoys to impossibility. And what does this person have in real life.
From modesty 55% of teenagers suffer, how many sufferings they because of it test. With age, people become less timid, but some even in older age experience difficulties in communication.
Modest people have no luck either in their personal lives or in their careers. Because they can not stand up for themselves. Such people can not submit themselves, even if they are good workers and professionals receive a small salary and they do not foresee any career growth. Such officials are loved by their superiors because they are silent, do not demand a salary increase. But there is no respect for such people.
Modesty can take pathological forms. Such people can not fight back if they are naughty, will be silent when they cheat at the store. At a time when you have to stand up for your rights, it will only be to blush, grow pale, will not be able to say a word in defense of yourself.
So modesty is of course a good quality, when it is present in moderation, but it should not interfere with living, enjoying and enjoying. And for this, first of all, you must have some of your own desires, though very modest.
To overcome modesty, you need to know the reason for your shyness. Most often the feeling of shyness comes about because you think how others will discuss you if you do something wrong. You think that people do not like you, that you are somehow worse than them. You expect things to go wrong. You are in a state of tension and worry, so things do not really go as you would like.
Because of your excessive modesty, people may think that you are unfriendly, not educated, and generally arrogant. But in fact you are just afraid to approach, start a conversation, are afraid to express your opinion, show your feelings. By this you are depriving yourself of the joy of life. But all can be corrected by putting effort and working on yourself.
Here are 10 tips for getting rid of excessive modesty:
1. Attach yourself an effort to not worry about what other people think about you. People will judge you not by any external manifestations, but by what kind of person you really are.
2. Do not demand perfection from yourself, be yourself. Look at your shortcomings and virtues realistically.
3. Assess others honestly, do not attribute to them undeservedly bad intentions towards you. Believe that people treat you as equals.
4. Learn to be sociable, smile more often and greet other people. Learn to tie a conversation yourself.
5. Try to treat yourself with a sense of humor, if you say something wrong. Do not pay attention to it, keep talking.
6. Set realistic goals, learn to make conversation with others, talk with strangers confidently and at ease.
7. If you need to speak to a large audience, prepare in advance for this event. Dress with taste, so as not to feel discomfort about this. People will be pleased to look at you. Communicate visually to the audience, convince them that you are telling them something very important to them.
8. Learn to develop a conversation with an interlocutor, compliments, ask the opinions of your interlocutor.
9. Look at yourself in the mirror and mentally describe yourself from the best side. Look, do not you need to change something in yourself, can change your hair. Consult a loved one you trust. The main task is to find in oneself good qualities and qualities.
10. Talk to yourself, as if about another person. List your shortcomings and judge that others have disadvantages much worse than you. But they feel much more confident in society than you. After you list all your dignity, and you will be convinced that you are much better than others and do not have to be modest.
To some extent, modesty is present in every person. But do not give her power over yourself. Than to lock yourself in isolation, it is better to free yourself from shyness and enjoy communication with other people. We hope that our 10 ways how to get rid of excessive modesty will help you.