And what to do when the flowers-children are constantly closed and remain in their own world? Many psychologists investigated the reasons for the isolation of children, but they did not reach a single conclusion, therefore there are a huge number of opinions and advice on how to get children out of the state of isolation.
Opinion of psychologists
Most researchers believe that the root of the problem should be sought in early childhood. Or rather, before the birth of the child, at the time of his gestation. Psychologists believe that if the baby was born prematurely, at about a period of up to 33 weeks, then, most likely, it will be an introvert, a person who is self-centered. The reason for this can serve as a long separation of the infant and mother immediately after childbirth. The fact is that premature babies are sent to Kuvez after birth, a special room where a certain moisture and temperature are maintained. This, in turn, affects the subconscious of the child, because instead of the first tactile sensations of contact with the mother, he gets loneliness.
But to write off the child's isolation only on prematurity is simply stupid and wrong. Among other reasons, researchers focus on the illnesses of children at a young age. When a child experiences pain, discomfort due to high fever or just fatigue, he goes into his world. This happens because the new state for him is unfamiliar and unpleasant. Therefore, do not take your child as a child. Sometimes you need to talk to him as an adult and clarify the situation. Plus this reason for the isolation of young children - short duration. As soon as the child recovers, all the problems and worries themselves evaporate.
The cause, which is caused by external factors, is much more serious. For example, schoolchildren can greatly hurt the bullying of peers because of glasses, fullness or small height. But children of preschool age can become locked in themselves because of quarrels between their parents. In fact, almost all psychologists say that one of the most common reasons for the isolation of children is the unfriendly atmosphere in the family. When a small child observes scandals within the family, there are significant changes in his outlook. The problem is that children tend to talk about all their friends, but they do not want to share such information, they conceal it in themselves, which is the reason for being withdrawn. Also, because of quarrels in the family, the child can find himself superfluous, unnecessary and will eventually become invisible.
Also, causal isolation can serve as a lack of communication with peers. Let's say you consider it stupid to spend money on a kindergarten, if you have a grandmother at home. But! In order for the child to develop correctly, he needs communication not only with adults, but first of all with one-year-olds. With them, he will be able to act on an equal footing, share interesting information. Of course, you can share with your grandmother, but what will be the response: "Umnichka! All in the father! "And all this instead of the expected dialogue, because the things he is talking about seem to him significant and important. It will be difficult for an adult to support this conversation "on equal terms". But this does not mean that you need to "lisp" with the child, try at this age to perceive it as an adult. Also, the lack of communication with peers can lead to inability to communicate with them. And then you should not be surprised that your child can not find a common language with children, you did not give him this opportunity.
So. The reasons are defined, now it is worthwhile to figure out whether your child is really closed or it's just your wild fantasy. Perhaps you are just an extrovert who loves to communicate, take guests, party and things like that. But this does not mean that your child should be exactly like that. If he happily goes to school, but does not have a hundred friends there and very carefully approaches the choice of a friend, then this does not mean that he is closed-minded. You must understand that all people are absolutely different, different temperaments, characters, behavior, so your son or daughter just does not look like you, but they are not closed at all.
It's another matter if the problem really exists and your child refuses to go to kindergarten, because he has no friends and interests there. Then you need to move on to active activities. The best method is to go to a child psychologist who will help your child self-assertively at a professional level.
But, this does not mean that all problems you can safely shift to the shoulders of a specialist. After all, one of the advice of a psychologist is sure to be your work with the child. How can we work with the child and independently rid him of the problem of isolation, we'll talk below.
Combating the isolation of the child at home:
1. Never put pressure on your child, do not squeeze. Imagine yourself in his place, would you be frank about the question: "What's going on with you? Why are you always silent? "
2. Such children are characterized by conservatism, at a time when they need quite another - innovations! Try to diversify his life, change the schedule of sleep and entertainment, in a word, experiment!
3. Do not forget to praise the child. He has to know that he is doing something useful that society needs.
4. Try to give him more attention. Do not be afraid to spoil it with tenderness, just do not indulge all desires.
5. Arrange holidays and invite your friends! At such times, your offspring will be able to get used to the society and become more relaxed.
6. As often as possible, take the child out into the light, make friends with friends and their children. Make it clear that you are proud of him. This will add self-confidence and self-confidence.
So, the reasons are considered, the advice is given, it remains to apply this all to your beloved son or daughter. The main thing, remember that the fate of the child is in your hands, and if you do not help him get out of the state of isolation, then success in the modern world can not be achieved!