But the question is, should not we love him as he is, and if not, why do we want to change a loved one, and what can this turn out.
So, let's try to understand this issue, at first glance everything is simple, we want to change a loved one, because something does not suit us in it. But this is only the tip of the iceberg, because if something does not suit us in the beloved, then is it really your favorite beloved for you? And this is the first question you need to answer. And also on the following questions, they will help you understand the reasons for wanting to change your man.
The first question. Do I love it?
As stated above, life is a complicated thing, and sometimes you can meet a seemingly ideal man, and everything is fine, but sparks, for some reason no. Or there is a spark, but the engine still does not start. Then you need to figure out whether what you do not like about your beloved person is maybe some important part of it, and if you lose it, a person can simply lose his self and will no longer be interesting. If you understand that something that you do not like in your beloved makes it individual, then most likely you just do not like it, but like the image created by your imagination, based on its other qualities.
The second question. Does he really have a lot of shortcomings?
Man in principle, and the man in particular, the creation is not ideal. And the ideal in general, in my opinion, is not achievable. But he is striving for it, at the same time, it is necessary. And what is needed, what would approach the ideal? Correctly to change lacks, but for this purpose it is first necessary to understand, whether really in our favorite there are so many lacks. After all, for sure, not all its shortcomings need to be changed, many of them on the essence of the matter are a small thing, with which it is quite possible and to try on. But if any of its qualities are absolutely perfect for you, then you should try to change them without a doubt. Your loved one has so many shortcomings. First you need to understand whether or not a person
The third question. An attempt to change a loved one, that would not change itself.
This is a well-known psychological course of defense, they are often used by both men and women, to blame for their shortcomings the other. And try to change it than change yourself. In this case, you must carefully look and analyze yourself, your beloved, and what exactly you do not get tired of. After all, maybe what you do not like about it is a direct consequence of what you do not like about yourself, and the conflicts that arise in you are not due to its negative qualities, but to yours. In order to adequately analyze this situation, it will not be out of place to seek the advice of a person from the side, not too close, but at the same time not completely alien.
Question four. Do not you get tired of something in your life?
Perhaps the desire to change your loved one is not due to the fact that you are not very happy with it, or not because something does not suit you. And simply because of the need to change something in life in general, it can be caused by many factors, failures at work, depression and many others. If after introspection, you realized that the reason is exactly this. That will be more correct to change, something in life, rather than change something in your beloved.
The above questions, of course, are not all that you have to answer in order to understand why, you so want to change your loved one. But I hope they will help you in solving your problems.