Undoubtedly, the birth of a child is a joy for every person, regardless of gender and status. But it also happens that for some people this event can become a pretext that complicates family relations. There is an opinion that the appearance of the child strengthens the marriage, and makes the couple closer to each other. But in reality, it happens that a lot of time must pass before maximum rapprochement and mutual understanding between the two adults. In some families, the appearance of a child can be a reason for changing relationships, not the best. Young mothers are, are absorbed in the baby, so much so that everything else, including the husband, gradually ceases to exist for them.
With the advent of the child, the woman has a catastrophically little time, she does not succeed in doing anything, does not have time to sleep, clean the house, cook dinner, do the laundry, just take care of herself and think about the tired husband who returned from work all day happy life for his family, and also deserves some attention. Very often it happens that the young parents move away from each other, and no less irritated than the husband, trying to stay away from the irritated wife, all later and later comes home. With the birth of a child, a woman's maternal instinct is more than manifested, which in some cases leads to the fact that the young mamanachinaet lives for herself and for her baby, while completely forgetting about her self-interest. All this, as a result, can lead to the fact that the relationship between the mother and the child does not leave room for the relationship between the husband and wife.
This does not mean that the two stopped loving each other, just everyone is ready to change their status and stop being just a husband or just a man, and become parents, understand that in the life of two people there is a third, uniting them more than just mutual feelings. True, it is worth considering that the appearance of the third, forcing the two to change something in their relations. So, changes are inevitable and so that they do not harm the family, but on the contrary, they strengthen the union, we must just be ready for them. We offer several tips that can help strengthen marriage after the birth of a child.
- Prepare better together, because in this way you not only fight with your fears, but also help to cope with the same your half. Do not be silent. Talk to each other about what and how will happen, when a child appears, what you are afraid of, and how you will cope with certain situations.
- Begin in advance to discuss and agree on the distribution of responsibilities for the care and upbringing of the child. You do not need to put everything on your shoulders, it is clear that young mothers are very suspicious, but, raising a child, you bring up at the same time and yourself. If you do not discuss everything in advance and expect that the spouse himself will show the same initiative that you can go out so that the expectation will be long and probably not justified. Discuss everything, absolutely everything, you do not need to think that the question exciting you now, when the baby is not yet born, is a trifle not worth mentioning. In the future, this little thing can be the reason for a major, but absolutely unnecessary quarrel.
- Determine in advance how you will be parents for your baby, which is acceptable for both of you, and that absolutely does not matter. What role in the upbringing of your baby will play dad, and what kind of mother.
- Do not forget about the rest. When a child appears, for parents, mainly for moms, work sometimes begins around the clock. It often happens that a young mother does not have time to eat or even to sleep. This is not the case, your health should be protected, if you fall from dehydration, it will not become easier for your baby or your husband. Therefore, discuss for a while what time of the day or week the care for the child will lie on the shoulders of your loved one, so that you can rest. With the replenishment of the family without mutual assistance, how not to manage.
- You do not need to spend all your time with a child. Do not forget about your man, the appearance of the baby is not a reason to forget about the relationship with each other. Try to find free time, in order to be alone, try at least occasionally, go out of the house to walk or sit in a cafe, leaving the child in the care of a grandmother or nurse.
- Your feelings and attitudes should not suffer due to the fact that "a little one needs it", "a little one needs it". A small one does not hurt, if you hug or kiss your husband, tell him how you love him and how happy when he is around.
Remember, drowning in the routine is simple, but getting out of it is much more difficult. Do not let the circumstances dictate to you how to live and treat each other, not you have to adapt to them. And do not be too fanatical to treat your child, remember he is the one who embodies the whole of the two halves, he is the one who makes you closer, and not vice versa.